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There's that moment where we have to do a weird dance to get into the bathroom without getting our ejaculate on anything. Anytime guys hear a creak or a far-off sound, they'll freeze, hunched over their keyboards the way primal man would hunch over his fire staring out into the dark when he heard the howl of a wolf. Whose to say they didn't though, you know? Yes, you can stream porn, but some dudes still download it. Not every guy uses lotion, and some guys swear by it.

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Neriah. Age: 31.
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There's that moment where we have to do a weird dance to get into the bathroom without getting our ejaculate on anything.

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Milan. Age: 21.
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Either we're just scrolling through Twitter and realize we've unconsciously had our hand in our pants for the last 15 minutes, or we have nothing to do so we're like, "Guess we might as well crank one out. Deciding whether he's going to navigate his computer with his dominant hand or masturbate with his dominant hand. Reaching for the tissues and realizing there aren't any. This isn't a problem for guys who just use their imagination not everyone watches porn, obviously.

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